[F.R.E.A.K.S] of [N.A.T.U.R.E]

[Devlin Tempest]

masquerading as a man

WITH A REASON

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my charade is the event

OF THE SEASON[/center]

• • •

I tapped the glass of the aquarium sword fish tank, ignoring the blatant looks of disapproval from passing tourists and marine nuts, watching undisturbed as a massive swordfish gliding past me shoot me the evil eye. I spun around in exasperation, and sighed, allowing my hands to dive into my pockets. “Remind me why we’re here again?”
Frankie, my favourite freakin’ weirdo whom I met about a year ago, was standing near the tank. She held a map of the aquarium we, well I like to think we stole it from the front desk. Who cares if the sign read ‘Please Take One’, we stole it. She was in charge of navigation.
Boredom does things to people. This is me, when twiddling thumbs and tapping tank glass was no longer acceptable. I get agitated, annoyed. Makes me want to pull that toupee off that fluffy man’s head over by the manta ray tank. That thing was not fooling anyone, he just looked desperate.
I averted my attention back to Frankie, before I said something that would have me thrown out again. I promised her, I’d behave. I wouldn’t get us thrown out like I had back at the King Tut exhibit. What can I say, mummies and sarcophagi are not exactly eye catching. And the smell…
Why so many exhibits, you ask? I was on holiday of course! Well, Frankie was. I invited myself; so now we’re cruising the Melbourne coastline, spending fistfuls of my parents money on shitty museums and penthouse hotel rooms. There was no better way to deal with Embers’ two month summer break than this. In a foreign country, with women lifeguards. Genuine double Ds. Why don’t we get those in America?

• • •

And if I claim to be a wise man

IT SURELY MEANS THAT I DONT KNOW

[Frankie Blake]

So be careful 'cause nothing they say is true
No don't believe a word



It's just us against the world
And we just gotta turn up to be heard

I had never liked summer holidays much as it usually meant two months of spending quality time with dear old mother, tasting wine in vineyards in France or watching opera in languages I didn't even know. I always found these activities boring and I made it clear to my mother. All I had ever wanted to do was visit the museums and aquariums that normal holiday goers did.
So that's was led me to be standing in Sea World with a 'stolen' map and a rich vampire. I had my own money of course but Tempie insisted on paying for everything, despite my arguments. So I spend my money on clothes and gifts to give to Eliza after the holiday.
"So," I say, walking towards Tempie. Nicknames last forever. "I think the easiest way in would be across this gate and into the outdoor shark pool. I can sort out the lock on the gates and we are in. Then, once we are finished swimming with sharks we can deal with the few security measures, nothing we can't handle I'm sure. A couple of security guards, a few cameras, stuff like that. And then we turn on the rides."
We had been coming to these places during the day and I would scope them out, decide the best way to get in without getting caught. Then at night we would sneak in and do all the things tourists do without the annoyance of tourists. Foolproof in my opinion.
"So," I grin, "What do you think?"

[Devlin Tempest]

masquerading as a man

WITH A REASON

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my charade is the event

OF THE SEASON[/center]

• • •

“I think…” I began, checking out a fat guard nibbling a Twinkie with speed and precision from the years of practice he’s had reflected in his potbelly, “This will definitely be easier than the Luna park attempt.” Anything would be easier than the Luna park attempt. Fecking, overtaking Nasa would be easier than the Luna park attempt, that place was rigged with burglar booby traps Frankie and I did not see coming. I straightened out my leather jacket, catching the eye of a hot blond over by the display cabinet. My crooked smile always won the show, and I watched her blush and chew her bottom lip while I yet again proved that fact.
My hair hung slightly in my eyes, and I brushed it back smoothly with my fingers. It wasn’t a move of vanity, I mean I was gorgeous, but my hair did just piss me off sometimes. I knew it needed a trimming, but I wouldn’t trust many people with that job. I’d wait till I got back to the US of A before that, just for that sense of reliability I had with my usual hairdresser. There was a bond there.
I rubbed my chin, looking over Frankies shoulder to the map. “One teensy observation though, could we not avoid sharks altogether,” I took the map from her hands, fully aware she hated it when people grabbed, and pointed to a set of gates by the shark pool, that possibly could guarantee us a dry arrival at the security measures section of her plan. “And break through this gate here?” I pointed to the section that was labelled, ‘Gate to Area 2 (Sharks)’.

• • •

And if I claim to be a wise man

IT SURELY MEANS THAT I DONT KNOW

[Frankie Blake]

So be careful 'cause nothing they say is true
No don't believe a word



It's just us against the world
And we just gotta turn up to be heard

I sighed, snatching the map back.
"But where's the fun in that Tempie?" I whined. "I can magic us dry if that's what you're worried about? Or are you just afraid of the big bad sharks?" I flashed him a smile, walking towards the shark tank. I knew that last comment would get to him and, hopefully, I would get my way.

An hour later we were back in our penthouse suite, passing the hours we had before putting our plan into action. Nothing more had been said about the shark tank, I was going to wait until after dinner to bring it up again.
I tied back my hair and slipped into jeans and an old shirt, not really feeling like dressing up for dinner. I wandered out into the living area where Tempie was pouring himself a glass of wine. I took out a wine glass for myself and filled it with sparkling water. I hadn't had a drop of alcohol in over six months.
"Can we order in tonight? I don't feel like going out, as you can see," I asked Devlin as I took a seat on the sofa beside him. At this point Tempie had seen me at my best and at my worst. I felt pretty comfortable around him. He was like a brother to me.

[Devlin Tempest]

masquerading as a man

WITH A REASON

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my charade is the event

OF THE SEASON[/center]

• • •

I didn’t even look up as she fell onto the couch beside me. “Why. You look great.” I sighed, my eyes scanning down the twelfth page of a Marie-Claire magazine. “But sure, gorge yourself. We’ll even feed the neighbourhood dogs some gourmet veal while we’re at it.” No, it wasn’t sarcasm; my parents had the money, I was going to spend it until my father gave his grown ass son back his Lamborghinis keys. Besides, my side of the check would be pretty bare for obvious, inhuman reasons; I need to spend on myself. May as well treat the dogs.
Yes, including Barbie here.
Muaha, nah, she was okay. I admittedly spent a lot of time with her these days, what can I say? She’s not your typical female, and it made her interesting. Cocky, too. I could appreciate that. Immune to my charms, which admittedly is not all a bad thing. Annoying sometimes, but it meant I knew she was honest. Can’t catch them all, if you know what I mean. No reference to Pokémon what so ever. It’s not like I was going to be joining her for dinner anyways. I actually think staying in is a great idea, considering whenever we go out to feed the human, that Filipino waiter gives me the creepiest stare. Almost lovey dovey, with the whole eye twinkle thing he does. Like he knows what I’m doing by not eating. Slimming down? Boy, I do not play for that field. I guess the only thing that kept him at bay was the human, so yay, friendship points there. Next page in the magazine, and take it from the top.
Despite what I said before about the field thing, yes, I was reading Marie-Claire, admiring the before and afters. ‘I lost 23kg in seven weeks’? “Good for you Jenine,” I gave a nod, and looked to Barbie, giving a ‘wow’ eyebrow raise and immediately moving back to the magazine to flip back through the pages, mouthing the word ‘ouch’. No make up, just bare faced Frankie. I’ve seen her in the mornings before her shower, and that was admittedly scarier, I just loved to piss her off. “I think I saw a cure for that somewhere in here.” I flipped the pages labelled ‘make up’ seriously, urgently, waiting for a reaction.
Inside, I was grinning.

• • •

And if I claim to be a wise man

IT SURELY MEANS THAT I DONT KNOW